My Story

I've wanted to share this for a long time, but was never really sure how to go about doing it.  Well, I'm just going to do it. 

My wife and I were baptized this past June together.  Other than being an awesome experience together it has brought us closer.  My daughter, pictured during Vacation Bible School, became such an inspiration to us both.

I hope you enjoy and God Bless you all.

My story is similar to many others.  I was raised in a loving house in which my parents and I attended church nearly every Sunday then off to Sunday school and youth group.  I remember always knowing about Jesus Christ and trusting him, but I wasn’t always convinced what His role would be in my life.  I wasn’t perfect but I was a good kid, I did the right things, I was nice to people and respected my elders with “Yes Sir” and “Yes Mama”.  I had it all figured out.

Enter college.  I had everything planned.  I was going to graduate with a degree by 21, check.  I would establish myself in my career before I ended up getting married, check.  Married by 25, check.  Have my first child before 30, check again.  Everything was going right.  I kept reaching for that next ring.  And after having my son, I knew in my head that next ring was financial security through making more money.  If I could financially get here we would be fine.  My wife could stay home, raise our kids, my life would continue to go on as I planned.  I wasn’t greedy with the amount…wasn’t praying to win the lotto; I knew the amount we needed to make it.  Over the next 4 years I would chase that ring.  I jumped at every single opportunity that was put in front of me to get there and to get out of another one.  This desire introduced me to people and situations that took me down a path of greed, anger, disappointment, a lack of confidence and major frustration.  I started questioning what I had done to deserve this.  I did everything right up to this point.  Why?  Why now?  For 4 years I voluntarily walk deeper into a dark tunnel and during this time I’d pray, but kept praying a prayer to Jesus letting him know “I’ve got this.  You’ve got more important things on your plate.  I’ll be fine, just watch over my family and keep them safe.  I’ll figure this out.”  The week before Thanksgiving 2007, it all crashed in on me.  As a contract advisor with a small company I was told that they were going in a different direction and didn’t need me anymore, income gone.  Driving home that same day with a lump in my throat I received a call from a recruiter on a possible job opportunity.  After the pleasantries he informs me that they were going another direction too.

After years of ‘having it under control’, I had no idea what just happened.  All I know is that it was completely unraveling and fast.  It took a couple days to finally sink in.  A couple months before all of this we started attending Wadsworth Community Church (now known as Freshwater) and the pastor (knows as Scott Brooks) was spending a lot of time on 1^st Samuel.  I could relate to the sermon and questioned myself if the Lord was speaking to me, but like Saul, I was hearing what I wanted to.  One afternoon, in early December Ryann was at work and my son at the sitters so I could be on the phone, reaching out to contacts and old acquaintances looking for job opportunities.  I was getting nowhere but I had people ‘praying for me.’  At this point going into Thanksgiving and Christmas, I was losing all hope for a quick response.  I was beaten down and lost.  I became so overwhelmed with emotion, recognizing my sins by putting my faith in earthly things.  I finally fell to my knees in my family room.  I remember sitting there looking skyward, tears welling up in my eyes and praying, “Jesus…I’m done.  I can’t do it anymore without you.  I need you and I need you right now.”   My walk with Jesus Christ was one where I wanted to be in front.  I wanted to lead.  I wanted to hear what I wanted to hear.  Right then at that moment it felt like He grab me by the wrist, like a Father figure before their child walks into the street, and a sense of relief that He could lead rather than walk from behind came over me. 

One week later I had 2 job offers, one south of Syracuse New York and another one near Cleveland.  The one in Syracuse, NY was enticing and they offered me more money to go there than any other offer over the past 4 years.  The money made it very attractive.  For many reasons this wasn’t going to work and I took the lesser paying local job.  I was done chasing that money ring.  Something told me I needed to stay here.  I was blessed with this job, albeit the challenges it presented at the time.  He had answered prayer and He had provided.  About a month into this new job I found out that my family would be blessed with a new addition. 

Even with my renewed faith hard times continued and I wanted to take control again.  You would think I would have learned my lesson and after 4+ long years in a very dark place, I did and I kept coming back to moment in my family room.  I will be patient and I will let him move me when he’s ready.  Another 4 years passed, and I was no longer driving from Wadsworth to Rocky River.  An opportunity was presented to me in Fairlawn.  He moved me again, and allowed me to do more for Him.  I’ve gotten involved with some great people here at Freshwater.  Ryann and I got involved with a Small Group, I became a co-coordinator for Financial Peace University and started a Men’s Fit Club here for guys who wanted to be a part of a group of believers and lose weight too.

More than 6 years have passed since that moment and I have been patient as to why I had to go through what I did to get here.  Last year our small group spent time studying the book of James.  After all this time of why and when, we read James 4: 13-15, “Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.”  Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.  What is your life?  You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” 

I had it all figured out and I was so wrong.  Jesus Christ has been so patient with me and shown me so much over the past several years, but even more over the past 24 months.  It’s amazing what He will show you when your heart and eyes are open to Him.  I know there is so much more.  I want God to turn my ‘mist’ into a wave of his will and his desire.